Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
