Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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