According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
