do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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