haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize