I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
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Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
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I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize