Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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