i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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