Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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