Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt

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(737): View more from Texas

at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...

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21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
Read it at the TFLN blog
(508): View more from Massachusetts

Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.

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(314): View more from Missouri

apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.

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(641): View more from Iowa

I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.

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(301): View more from Maryland

I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...

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