Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
