Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Randomize
