you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Randomize
