i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Randomize
