Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
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