Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
40s are totally the cure
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
