I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize