I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
