Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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