I must be too annoying 4 u.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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