ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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