i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I party with great urgency now.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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