Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i just sent this text using only my big toe
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
