I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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