the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
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I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
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You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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