I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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