This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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