Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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