The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize