sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
