Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
