It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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