what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
