Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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