I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Randomize
