I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Randomize
