Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize