Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
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fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
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remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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