sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
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