My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Vodka?
Forever.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
