Texts From Last Night

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  (509): View more from Washington

  i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.

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  (509): i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it. http://tfl.nu/yjzk
  Replies (12) Good night (1203) Bad night (2857)
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  (315): View more from New York

  playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps

  (315): View more from New York

  warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey

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  (315): playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps (315): warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey http://tfl.nu/dgn3
  Replies (86) Good night (4037) Bad night (623)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?

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  (971): you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything? http://tfl.nu/ldjb
  Replies (25) Good night (5404) Bad night (869)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge

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  (704): I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge http://tfl.nu/naaa
  Replies (21) Good night (6889) Bad night (586)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.

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  (813): I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester. http://tfl.nu/cawp
  Replies (25) Good night (3208) Bad night (848)
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.

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  (423): it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise. http://tfl.nu/943e
  Replies (25) Good night (7550) Bad night (1059)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.

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  (314): I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate. http://tfl.nu/fw6h
  Replies (12) Good night (2705) Bad night (994)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood

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  (402): Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place (402): This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded (402): Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood http://tfl.nu/jep5
  Replies (8) Good night (1783) Bad night (819)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."

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  (770): You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt." http://tfl.nu/x17b
  Replies (8) Good night (1437) Bad night (578)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.

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  (636): Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year. http://tfl.nu/cp8d
  Replies (4) Good night (577) Bad night (960)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog

  (1-574): View more from Indiana

  knight in shining armor

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  (574): he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog (1-574): knight in shining armor http://tfl.nu/bdyw
  Replies (1) Good night (1033) Bad night (514)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX

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  (703): He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX http://tfl.nu/gbwm
  Replies (6) Good night (1444) Bad night (907)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break

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  (704): Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break http://tfl.nu/3onf
  Replies (1) Good night (314) Bad night (702)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time

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  (954): I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time http://tfl.nu/1q0v
  Replies (1) Good night (522) Bad night (292)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter

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  (541): He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter http://tfl.nu/mn2b
  Replies (5) Good night (671) Bad night (175)

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