We're like a lot better than the average bears
OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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