Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize
