You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize
