I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
