plz talk dirty to me
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??