you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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