3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
There's even glitter on my cock...
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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