I want to walk on stilts...naked
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
