I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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